Let me go back a few years to my time teaching at Morehead Middle School. I just finished the last class of the day and am deciding what to work on before going home. Then I remember that, actually, I have to contact parents to make arrangements for their kids to come in after school for tutoring. All math teachers have to identify and do after school tutoring for low performing students based on state test results last year.
I’m like “math teachers have to work harder than other teachers!” Beep! An announcement comes on the PA system. “Reminding all teachers to attend the faculty meeting in the library. It starts in 5 minutes.”
I Don’t Have Time for This
I am suddenly so frustrated! “I don’t have time for this! I don’t remember this being announced in the first place!”
I grab something to work on during the meeting, but I’m so disorganized that I can’t even think straight. I’ll grab the warm ups and grade them. Where’s my pen? What was the warm up question? I am grumbling, and complaining to anyone who is near me while heading to the library.
Thoughts continue swirling in head: I have to grade so many papers; I need to email parents; I need to make copies for the test tomorrow. Grades are due and I have an endless list of things to do for admin. PLC and CIT.
I am not mentally engaged or really present at meeting. I act like I’m grading, but I am thinking of my family and wondering what will i come home to. I am judging the presenters and finding no value to this meeting. I have more things on my plate than I did before now.
As a result, I just wasted an hour in a faculty meeting and I still have all the things to do before I go home, or most likely after I get home.
Can You Relate?
This woman needs help! She doesn’t even know what she needs, but she is not living the dream.
She is thinks she’s frustrated because of the faculty meeting, but she is really frustrated because of what she is thinking. Sentences in her brain that say “i don’t have time for this! I don’t remember this being announced.”
Because the thought “I don’t have time for this,” creates frustration in her body, frustration fuels these actions:
- She is going through the checklist of things she needs to do instead
- She can’t find what to work on while at meeting
- She doesn’t participate and complains
- She judges the presentation and presenters
- and she is not really grading or frankly doing anything at the meeting
This version of Kim is blaming everything on others or her circumstances. “I have to do this and that”, right?
What if there was a fantasy land where this woman could think, “I totally have time for this meeting. What will I learn that I need to know?” I hear you laughing!! But just stay with me!
What if …
What would that feel like? peace, confidence. curiosity?
What would she do?
- Maybe make suggestions,
- listen,
- learn,
- make connections with people around her.
- Make decisions about what she’ll do with the information presented. That decision will depend on whether it will help her stay focused on her goals and priorities as a teacher or not. She won’t feel guilty about not doing it.
As a result she is the teacher and mom she wants to be.
Where is this fantasy land? Could it be in her power to go there? Her belief feels so true, right? She really believes that she doesn’t have time for one more thing.
I know! That was me! But if I could talk to that Kim…
I would ask her if she is living a rewarding life.
Do the things on her list lined up with her priorities?
Are they really important, or just feel urgent?
I would ask her if she remembers why she started teaching anyway?
What are her priorities and how much time do she spend on them.
